


I'll Be Watching You

by YamiAki96



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fighting, Hostage Situations, Hurt Castiel, I'm bad at suspense, M/M, Nightmares, Shooting, Stalking, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-30
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-04 08:43:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3061391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiAki96/pseuds/YamiAki96
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Twink!Cas with a creepy secret admirer turned stalker who wants Cas all to himself. But then Dean, who Cas is secretly in love with but doesn't realise it's mutual, ends up saving the day</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was sweet at first. Castiel would get home and check his mail and there would be an anonymous note from an admirer. They always said sweet things like how nice he looked or how kind he was. Cas tucked them all into a special box and looked at them when he upset.

 

He expected his admirer to reveal themselves, but a year had gone by and they still hadn’t shown up at his door or signed a note. 365 love letters from a stranger.

 

Castiel knew who he hoped they were from. His neighbour and long time friend, Dean. It was a fools dream, of course, Dean was a straight as they came and he was lightyears out of Castiel’s league. But he could pretend that every time the words warmed his heart, Dean had written them.

 

Until now.

 

Castiel stared at the note, unsure what to think or do.

 

_You’re beautiful when you sleep._

 

Castiel hadn’t slept with anyone in the past year. Not since breaking up with Balthazar. They couldn’t be from him, he moved to England the week they ended things.

 

“Hey, Cas!” Castiel jumped and spun around. Dean was standing at his own mailbox, shifting through the envelopes. “What’s up?”

 

“Nothing,” Castiel answered quickly. “Did you see anyone here today.” Dean shook his head.

 

“Just you. Are you okay?”

 

“Yes. Just…I’m fine. Have a nice evening.”

 

Dean barely got out a “You, too,” before Castiel closed his door behind him.

 

He stared at the note, frightened by the words. His bedroom was on the second floor, no one could just look in and see him. He never slept anywhere else. He hadn’t spent that night with someone else in over a year.

 

He crumpled the note and walked towards the trash can, then stopped. Thinking better of it, He straightened the paper as best he could, then went to his room and tucked it in with the rest of the notes.

 

He walked to the window and closed the curtains, knowing that he would no longer be able to sleep with them open.

 

* * *

 

You watch him as he checks the mail. Wait for him to get your note. To smile like he always does when he reads them. But he doesn’t, he looks frightened. Why?

 

His stupid neighbour scares him when he approaches. You hate him. He’s always around when he shouldn’t be.

 

They speak briefly before Castiel hurries inside.

 

You think about what could have upset him as you drive away. You called him beautiful. And he was. His white sheets had settled low on his hips while he slept on his back. The moonlight made his smooth pale skin glow. His hair had been wild and dark against his pillow. You watched him for hours.

 

He probably just misunderstood, you decide. He’ll understand soon. He’ll love you, too.

 

You drive around aimlessly for several hours before you go back to his house. His neighbor is still awake. You can see him through the window. You’ll have to be careful.

 

You take your time making your way around his house, staying in the shadows. You finally get to the tree beneath his window and make your way up it.

 

His curtains are closed.

 

You seeth the whole way home. Why would he do that? Why would he hide from you? When all you have ever done is love him?

  
You’ll just have to come up with another way to see him, you decide. You’ll fix this


	2. Chapter 2

The notes that came the following days were less disturbing, but Castiel no longer felt the surge the joy when he read them. They frightened him now.

_You deserve to be happy_ , was the latest one. Innocent enough. The words rang through Cas's head as he walked into the building he worked in.

"Good morning, Castiel," Inais, another accountant at the firm, said when he got to his desk.

"Hello, Inais."

"Ready for the weekend?"

"Most definitely."

They were silent for a long time, looking over their work for the day. Inais looked up, ready to say something when the door opened.

Andreas Crowley sauntered in, carrying two cups of coffee. Castiel smiled at him and accepted one of them. Inais made an excuse about needing a file and left them alone.

"Good morning, Castiel."

"Good morning, Crowley." They had been flirting for months now. Castiel had been hesitant about the advances at first, just out of a relationship with a broken heart, but Crowley was persistent. Coffee everyday, lunch when Cas has a lot of work and couldn’t leave the office. It was nice and Castiel basked in it.

"Are you finally going to accept my dinner invitation?" Crowley asked. Castiel bit his lip, but nodded.

"Yes."

"Excellent. I’ll pick you up at seven."

"See you then." Castiel smiled.

He could barely keep his mind on his number all day, too excited for his date to focus.

He asked Inais to double check his numbers and found that screwed up right in the middle of his columns. When five o’clock rolled around, he was out the door before anyone could stop him.

He hadn’t been on a date in so long, he really wasn’t sure what to expect or how to look and act.

He showered first, trying to get his hair under control and checking for imperfections he could fix. Finding that it was a waste of precious time, he gave up.

He dug through his closet, trying to find something nice. Crowley had never seen him in anything other than his work clothes, ill fitting suits and his trench coat. He wanted to blow his mind, wanted to look so good that he couldn’t take his eyes off of him.

He took out a dark blue button down that Balthazar always liked to see him in and a nice pair of black dress pants.

He debated on the contacts that he rarely wore and decided against them. He wanted to be see and enjoy the night.

He grabbed his trench coat, a safety jacket more than anything.

Crowley arrived at seven on the dot. Castiel locked the door behind them and waved to Dean who was carrying a bag of take out from a nearby Chinese place.

"You look wonderful," Crowley said, holding the car door for him.

"Thank you," Castiel said, feeling his cheeks heating. His car was nice, expensive and foreign. The leather seats were soft, comfortable. Castiel had a feeling that this car was a true reflection of its owner.

"Where are we going?" He asked, after Crowley had started driving.

"Do you like Italian?"

"Love it."

"There’s this nice place downtown, classy, private. I thought we may go there, if you’d like."

"That sounds great."

He took a chance and touched Crowley’s hand with his fingertips. The other man intwined their fingers and Castiel smiled.

The restaurant was wonderful, it was small, quiet, candle lit.

They talked about everything. Castiel was surprised at how down to earth Crowley was.

"I was a teenager, too, love. And I was a mess of one. Parties, drugs, alcohol, you name it, I was into it."

"I was a homebody," Castiel said. "No one really noticed me."

"Were they blind?" Castiel ducked his head, blushing again.

They shared a dessert and Crowley gave the waitress a credit card.

They held hands again on the way back to Castiel’s house. Crowley walked him to the door, and cupped his face in both hands.

The kiss was fantastic, just how Cas liked them. The right amount of tongue, right amount of pressure. Perfect.

"Do you want to come in?" Castiel asked, tugging lightly on his jacket.

"Yes."

Castiel led him inside, locking the door behind them. Crowley wouldn’t be leaving tonight.

* * *

He's home.

You rush to your computer, ready to watch over him.

There’s someone with him. A dark haired man. What is doing there?

He’s leading him to the bedroom, you switch to the camera installed there, horrified. He’s going to hurt Castiel, you just know it.

You watch as Castiel makes sure the curtains are closed before pulling the man to the bed.

They kiss and you see red. They’re touching, undressing, moaning and speaking. You’re too betrayed to understand them.

You do your best to block him out as Castiel sinks down on top of him. You close your eyes. His virtue has been stolen right before your eyes and there is nothing you can do.

You pretend to be in his place as the move, pretend that you are making Castiel make those noises, not him, Andreas. You hate him.

It goes on for hours. He rolls on top of Castiel and you turn away. You can’t watch what’s your’s be defiled.

Then you hear the word that breaks you: “Stay.”

Castiel wants that monster to spend the night in his bed and you can no longer see straight.

You turn the screen off as they curl up together. As Castiel lays his head on his chest. Holds his hand.

You can’t sleep, too angry to settle. You drive inside. Drive and drive until you turn around at day break.

You go to Castiel’s house. He’s still there. They’re have breakfast, you guess.

The door opens an hour later, he’s finally leaving. Castiel is there. They kiss goodbye. It’s a long kiss, Castiel wraps his arms around him. You hate him.

He says his parting words and walks to his car. You follow him as he drives away.

When you’re far enough away from Castiel’s house, you go faster, you hit him while in a curve.

His car spins and you smile as it turns over.

You leave him and the wreckage there, not caring what happens to them. You hope it catches fire.

No one else touches him. No one else has him. Castiel is yours.


	3. Chapter 3

Castiel was at work when he found out about Crowley’s accident.

He was worried because Crowley had not come by all morning. He was blaming himself, thinking that Crowley had lost interest him because he was boring.

"Castiel," Inais said, walking up to his desk.

"Good morning, Inais."

"I’m surprised you’re here. I thought you may be at the hospital."

"Why would I be at the hospital?" Castiel asked.

"After Crowley’s accident-"

"What accident?"

"You haven’t heard? Crowley was in an awful accident Saturday. He’s been in the hospital for a few days. I thought you would have heard."

"Oh. Is he alright?"

"I don’t know. You can ask Mr. Adler."

Castiel was a wreck for the rest of the day. His numbers were all wrong, he couldn’t focus, he had no appetite. His boss eventually told him to just go home and calm down.

He went to the hospital instead.

A pretty nurse pointed him to Crowley’s room, telling him to hurry because he had to go into surgery soon.

Crowley was awake, reading over some papers. He was wrapped in bandages and casts.

"Andreas?" Castiel said, pausing at the door.

"Castiel. Come in." Castiel dropped into the chair beside his bed.

"I just heard about your accident. Are you okay? God, what am I talking about? Look at you!"

"I’m fine, over all," Crowley said. "Relax, Castiel, before you give yourself a heart attack. I have a few broken bones and cuts and bruises. They’re doing surgery on my leg today."

"What happened?"

"Someone hit me, my car flipped. Some Good Samaritan called it in."

Castiel didn’t know what to say. He just grabbed Crowley’s hand. Crowley pulled away gently.

"Did I hurt you?"

"No, love. But I think you need to call the police. Or do something to protect yourself."

"What? Why?"

"The car that hit mine, it followed me from your neighborhood. And I’ve gotten several calls here telling me to stay away from you or the job would be finished. I’m worried about you."

"Oh, my God," Castiel whispered.

His admirer. That was the only person it could be. Why would they do this? Why would they hurt someone like this?

"You should go," Crowley said. "They’ll be here soon to prep me."

"I’ll come and see you again soon."

"I don’t know if that’s a good idea."

"Oh. Of course." Castiel bit the inside of his cheek. "Goodbye, then."

"For now."

Castiel stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. Crowley tugged him over and they kissed softly.

"I’ll call you," Crowley said. Castiel nodded. He wished him well and left the hospital.

He was almost afraid to check to his mail when he got home. The note was on top of his regular mail, as always, but instead of joy, he felt sick. He opened it and read what was written.

You’re mine, you whore. No one else can have you.

Castiel dropped the mail. How did they know? Castiel kept his curtains closed, his doors locked. No one knew that he was going out with Crowley. Except…

He went next door and banged on the door. Dean always did his books on Monday, Castiel had helped him multiple times.

"Hold on!" The door opened, revealing Dean. "Cas? What’s up?"

"Have you been sending me notes?"

"Notes?"

"Yes, notes. Somebody has been leaving them in my mailbox all year."

"Why would I leave notes in your mailbox when I could just walk over and talk to you?"

Castiel couldn’t hold it in anymore. The admirer to turned stalker, Crowley, and now he had accused someone he knew wouldn’t hurt him.

He sat on Dean’s front step and started crying.

"Cas, come on inside," Dean said. He helped him up and led him to the living room. After finding a pack of tissues and giving them to him, he disappeared into the kitchen. He returned to two cups of coffee.

"Okay. What’s going on?"

Castiel told him everything. About the how nice the notes were when it all started, the sudden change, Crowley.

"Have you called the police?" Dean asked.

"What can they do?" Castiel asked. "Put my house under survalence? You never saw him, I’ve never seen him."

"They may be able to do something."

"You’re right. Can I use your phone?"

"Sure."

Castiel told the police everything and gave them the box of notes. They did a brief search of his house and found cameras all over it. Castiel started crying again. Their tech team disabled them, but Castiel still felt violated.

"You can stay with me," Dean offered. "Until they find the guy."

"I don’t want to impose."

"You’re not. This is sick. I’d feel better if you stayed with me."

"Okay." Castiel packed a bag and followed Dean to his house. The police said they would run checks on the notes and the cameras. Castiel thanked them.

Dean showed him to the guest room and how to work the shower.

"Do you want some thing to eat?" Castiel shook his head.

"I’m so disgusted right now, I don’t think I could keep anything down."

"Okay, l’ll leave you to it then. Yell of you need anything."

"Thank you, Dean."

"No problem. I’ll be downstairs."

He left Castiel alone. For the first time in years, the hot water didn’t relax him.

* * *

You watch him leave the Sandover building and follow him to the hospital.

You know you can’t go in. He’ll see you. You’re not worried. The British prick won’t do anything with him anymore. Not after your threats.

He doesn’t stay long. He’s back in his car twenty minutes after he went inside. You wait a few minutes, then follow him home.

He’s talking to his neighbor when you arrive. You want to wrap him up in your arms when he starts crying. He does it instead, taking Castiel inside.

You can’t watch them in his house. You have to wait. You’ll kill him if he touches Castiel. You’ll kill them both.

You’re shocked out of your daydream of how you would kill him when the police arrive. The neighbor opens the door for them. You leave.

When you get home, you go straight to your computer.

Castiel gave them the box he keeps with your notes inside. You watch in anger as the cop flips through them, asking Castiel if they can get his fingerprints so they don’t get mistaken for evidence. Does he really think that you’re so stupid as to leave your prints on them?

You’re startled by a sudden close up of one the officers faces. Then it’s gone. You can only watch helplessly as your cameras are dismantled.

In the last glimpse you get of him, Castiel looks disgusted.

How can he be disgusted? How can he not understand how much you love him?

You drive back to his neighborhood just in time to see him and his neighbor shaking the officers’s hands. Castiel has a duffle bag over his shoulder. Where is he going?

You seethe as he follows him into his house. He’s staying with that idiot? You can’t stand for that.

You don’t know how long you sit in your angry haze, but all of a sudden it’s dark outside.

You get out of the car and knock on the door.

"Just a second!" The neighbor answers the door. "Can I help you?"

"Yeah," You answer. "My car broke down a few miles back. Can I use your phone?"

He looks torn, but eventually nods.

"Yeah. Wait here, I’ll get it for you."

"Thank you."

You wait until his back is turned to attack.

You pick up something that looks heavy and hit him over the head. He crumbles to the ground instantly. You smile at the blood.

"Dean? Who was it?" Castiel’s voice calls from upstairs. You hear footsteps. "Dean?"

You turn to see him come down the stairs. He freezes. Your eyes meet.

You smile.

"Hello, Castiel."


	4. Chapter 4

Castiel stared at the man standing in the living room, surprised and afraid.

“Inais? What are you doing here?” His friends smiled in a way that made Castiel shiver.

“I wanted to see you.” Castiel took a step back. He never told anyone from work where he lived.

“How did you know I’d be here? Where’s Dean?”

“He’s out.” Castiel stepped back on the stairs as Inais came closer.

“I want you to leave. I’ve had a bad day and I’m tired. I’ll see you on Monday.”

“I know all about your day, Cas. I know everything about you.” Quicker than lightening, Inais grabbed Castiel’s wrists. The other fought and pulled, but he was stronger. Inais shoved him into the wall, causing him to hit his head hard.

“I’m sorry it had to be like this,” Was the last thing that Castiel heard as darkness closed over him.

He was sitting when he woke up. The first thing he saw when his vision adjusted was Dean laying in the floor, not moving. He tried to say his name, but there was something over his mouth.

“Good, you’re awake.” Inais was standing just out of his line of sight. “If I take this off will you be quiet.”

Castiel nodded, fighting tears and the burn in his chest. He whimpered as the tape pulled his skin.

“Why are you doing this?” He whispered. He flinched when Inais touched his face.

“Because I love you. We’re going to be so happy together, Castiel.”

“Why did you hurt Dean and Crowley?” Anger flashed in Inais’s eyes.

“Crowley stole what was supposed to be mine. He took your virtue from you. He hurt you.”

“My- I haven’t had my virtue since I was in high school.” Inais slapped him.

“Liar. You were pure. You were mine.” Inais took a breath and touched Castiel’s cheek softly. “But it’s okay. I know you didn’t want that. We can fix it.”

Behind him, Castiel saw Dean’s fingers twitch. A second later he started to lift his head. Their eyes met and Castiel shook his head minutly. Dean laid his head back down and closed his eyes.

“Yes, we can fix it,” Castiel said, looking at Inais. “I want to fix it.”

“Oh, Castiel. I knew you’d see it my way.” Inais kissed him. Cas felt bile in his throat, but forced himself to kiss back. He tugged at the tape around his wrist.

“I want to touch you. Cut me free so I can hold you, please.”

“I’ll be right back.” Inais walked to the kitchen. When he was gone, Dean looked up.

“You need to get out of here,” Castiel whispered.

“I’m not leaving you.”

“Dean, he’ll kill you.” Dean sighed and bit his lip.

“Upstairs,” He whispered. “I have a gun in my room. If one of us could get it-”

They heard footsteps coming back and Dean dropped again. Castiel tugged at the tape, trying to look eager. Inais chuckled.

“So eager,” He said. He cut the tape and pulled Castiel up. Cas wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling into his neck. He was close enough to nudge Dean with his toes. He looked up and Castiel made a small motion toward the stairs.

“You love me, so much,” Castiel whispered, as he started to move.

“I do.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you wait so long?”

Dean froze at the stairs as Inais pulled back to look at Castiel.

“You were still getting over that bastard you were dating before. Then Crowley swooped in and stole you from me.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t see it. I-” There was a creak. Inais spun around as Dean started running.

“You lying slut.” He hit Castiel. “I’ll kill you, you whore. I’ll kill you both.”

Castiel grabbed the scissors that Inais had used to cut him free from the table and swung. There was a cry of pain and he ran for the kitchen. He couldn’t follow both him and Dean.

“Get back here!” He roared. Castiel made it to the kitchen door and tried to pull it open to no avail. His sweaty fingers slipped on the lock. He sighed in relief when it finally unlocked. Hands were on him, then, and slammed his head into the wood.

“It could have been so easy,” Inais spat as he fell. “I could have made you happy, Castiel.”

“I would have never been happy with you! You’re a monster!”

“No, I’m not! I worshiped you. I waited for you. I would have given you everything. But you just can’t get over your obsession your stupid neighbor.” He kneeled down and got into Castiel’s face. “He’ll never love you. You’re just a disgusting slut.” He grabbed Castiel and pulled him up, smirking. “Now you can watch me kill him.”

Castiel snapped his head forward, banging it against his captures. He released him and Castiel ran out the door. Hands shoved him when he got to the back stairs. Two gun shots fired as he tumbled down, hitting his head, again and again.

“Cas!” Dean fell next to him. “Cas, hey look at me. The police are coming, alright. We’re gonna be fine.”

“Is...he’s dead?”

“I shot him.”

“Good.” Castiel’s eyes fluttered closed and Dean’s arms tightened around him.

“Hey, you gotta stay awake. Come, baby, open your eyes for me.” Castiel smiled weakly.

“‘Like that. Baby.”

“I’ll call you baby for the rest of your life if you stay awake.”

“‘m awake. Just...resting…”

He fell asleep to the sounds of sirens and shouting and Dean’s arms holding him tight.


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing that Castiel was aware of when he woke up was the beeping of his alarm clock. He reached out to hit, but gentle fingers caught his wrist.

He opened his eyes, confused and saw Dean Winchester sitting next to him, smiling a little.

“There they are,” He said, looking at Castiel’s eyes. He picked up a cup from the table next to him and held it to Castiel’s lips.

Castiel glanced around. He was in a hospital? What happened?

“What’s going on?” Cas asked, croakily.

“What do you remember?” Castiel laid back and closed his eyes. Flashes of that night played in his mind.

“Inais?” He whispered.

“Dead. I’m really sorry, Cas.”

‘What about you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah. No concussion or anything. But you,” Dean’s hands started to shake. “You were out for three days. The doctors said it was probably just shock, but I….I thought….”

Dean met his eyes again and started to lean in. The door opened and a doctor walked in, causing him to straighten up.

“Mr. Novak, it’s good to see you awake. I’m Dr. Moseley.”

“Hi.”

“I’ll just step into the hall,” Dean said, starting to stand, but Castiel grabbed his hand.

“Stay. Please?” Dean seated himself again, not letting go. Dr. Moseley smiled.

She ran a few preliminary test, shining a light into his eyes and having him follow her finger with them. She wrote something down on her clipboard.

“Are you in any pain?”

“A little. I guess from the bruising.”

“We’ll get you some pain medication,” She said. “But , from the looks of your charts you’re perfectly fine. I’d like to keep you for another day or so, just to be sure.”

“Okay.”

“Is there anything else I can do for you?”

“My friend, Andreas Crowley is here because of a car accident. Can you tell me how he is?”

“I’ll find out,” She nodded and walked out.

“How ya doin’?” Dean asked, when they were alone. Castiel shook his head.

“I don’t know. I keep hoping that I’ll wake up and it will all be a dream. An awful, awful dream.” Dean squeezed his hand. Castiel took a moment to look at his friend, surprised by what he saw. Dean had dark circles under his eyes and at least three days worth of beard on his face.

“How long have you been here?”

“The whole time, mostly. I went home to pack a bag.”

“You didn’t have to-” Dean put a finger to his lips.

“I wanted to. I couldn’t stand it if you woke up alone.”

A nurse came in and injected what Castiel guessed was the pain medicine into his IV. He thank her and she left.

“What about visiting hours?” He asked, starting to feel light. “How did you convince them to let you stay?” Dean looked a little sheepish.

“I told them that I was your fiance and that I was all you had. I guess the nurses have a soft spot for that kind of thing.”

Castiel laughed a little. He tried to squeeze Dean’s hand, but he’s not sure if he did.

“Thank you, Dean,” He said. As he floated off, he could have sworn he heard Dean say ‘you’re welcome, baby.’

~*~

Castiel soon learned that just because the monster was dead, it didn’t mean that the nightmare was over.

He couldn’t sleep at night without Dean having to shake him awake from dreams that haunted him throughout the day. People at work pointed at him, whispering, so much so that he had to take stress leave.

He usually spent the day sitting with Crowley, who was going to be fine after the bones and other injuries healed.

They decided not pursue a romantic relationship. After everything that had happened, Castiel didn’t think that he could handle one at the time being.

“How are you holding up, kitten?” Crowley asked one day. Castiel looked up from the steaming tea he wasn’t drinking.

“As well as can be expected,” He said, looking down again. “I’m not sleeping, so Dean’s not sleeping. We argued this mornig.”

“It’s very nice him to take care of you,” Crowley said, wiggling his eyebrows. Castiel shook his head.

“It’s not like that. I’m just afraid to be alone. He feels obligated, I guess.”

“He likes you. I can tell.”

“You think?”

“Who wouldn’t? You’re an amazing person, Castiel. Don’t seal yourself away because of some monster, not when there is someone good for you waiting.”

“Thank you, Andreas,” Castiel said, squeezing his hand.

“No problem, pet. Now get home before it gets dark.” Castiel made sure that Crowley was comfortable and had plenty of entertainment before he left. Dean was just pulling in when he got home. He got out of his car and waved.

“How’s your friend?”

“He’s doing well. How was your day?”

“Same as always.”

Dean had staying with Castiel since he was released from the hospital. He slept on the couch, he woke Castiel when the nightmares attacked, he cooked, he did everything.

“Cas,” He said, one night when he was making dinner.

“Yes, Dean?”  
“I….That night, Inais said….he told you that I would never want you-”

“He was psychopath, Dean,” Castiel interrupted. He couldn’t handle Dean’s rejecting. Not right now. “He was lying.”

“I know. Because only an idiot wouldn’t want you.”

“What?” Dean sighed.

“I like you. I have for a long time. But you were with Balthazar, then Crowley, and you never really showed any interest in me so I….”

“I like you, too,” Castiel said, quickly. “But right now I just can’t.”

“Oh. No, yeah, I get that. But now you know.” Castiel smiled and grabbed his shirt. The kiss was brief, but it got the message across.

“Now I know. I’d like to see whee this can go, when things get better.”

“Okay.”

~*~

Inais had the knife against Dean’s throat. Castiel was frozen in the doorway, watching them.

“It could have been so easy, Castiel,” He said, a cruel smile twisting his features. “But you just couldn’t let him go.”

“Cas, get out!” Was the last thing Dean said before Inais cut his throat.

Castiel woke up screaming.

He heard cursing and loud footfalls before the bedroom door flung open and arms were around him.

“Let me go!” He screaming, fighting. “Let go! Dean!”

“Shh,” Dean said, rocking him a little. “It’s okay, Cas. Calm down, baby. It’s alright.”

“Dean?” Castiel stopped fighting and curled into his arms. “You were dead. He killed you.

“I’m okay. We’re okay.” Castiel cried into his t-shirt, clutching the fabric tightly.

“Why did have to choose me? Why me, Dean?”

“I don’t know, Cas. I don’t know.”

When Castiel finally calmed down an hour later, Dean shifted so that he could lay back down, then stood to leave. Castiel caught his fingers.

“Stay,” He whispered. “Sleep with me.”

“Okay.” Dean laid down on top of the blanket and laid an arm over Castiel’s waist and pressed his lips to his hair. “Go to sleep. I’ll be here.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

“Shh,” Dean rubbed his back. Castiel nestled into his chest and fell asleep.

The nightmares didn’t come back that night.


	6. Chapter 6

"That was a little over a year ago now," Castiel said. 

The nightmares still hasn’t stopped, even after all that time. Dean had gotten several bruises and almost a broken nose from trying to wake Castiel up. Cas thought a therapist would be able to help. 

”I see. You know it’s normal to have very bad nightmares after a trauma like that.” 

”Yes, but it’s been so long.” 

”Everyone deals with trauma differently. A good support system helps. What’s your relationship like with Dean now?” 

”We’re getting married,” Castiel said, twisting the ring that Dean had given him. He still couldn’t believe that it had happened. That Dean was still so willing to love him after all of this.

”And your friends?” 

”Crowley is the only friend I really see anymore.” The therapist wrote that down. 

”What about work? Did you ever go back?” Castiel shook his head. 

”I couldn’t. The way people talked about me and seeing his desk everyday, I just couldn’t take it. I work at a bookstore downtown right now.” 

”That’s good. You’re getting out, at least.” She said. 

”The only problem I have is the nightmares. I get out, I can function, but when I go to sleep, I see him.” 

”Have you talked about that night?”

”I just told you about it.” 

”Yes, but have you really talked about it?” 

”I-I’m not sure. I thought that that was all I needed to say.” 

”If he was here, what would you say to Inais?” 

”I’d ask him why he chose me. What did I do to make him think that I wanted him? Why would he go so far and hurt people that I cared about? What would I have done if he succeeded in killing one of them?” Castiel felt the tears building, but held them back. “I’d like to rub in his face that he didn’t break me. That I’m happy and getting married and he is nothing but a nightmare.” 

”He’s nothing but a nightmare. Remember that. I’ll see you next week.” 

Castiel considered what he had said as he drove home. Inais was dead. He was only a nightmare and couldn’t hurt them anymore. He felt stronger the more that he thought about it. 

Dean was making dinner when got home. The smell of chicken and rosemary floated from the kitchen, drawing Castiel in. 

Dean had his headphones on an was swinging his hips to whatever he was listening to. Castiel snuck up behind him and ran his fingers over his sensitive sides. Dean jumped and threw a glare over his shoulder that melted into a smile when Cas hugged him. 

”How did it go?” He asked, taking the headphones off. Soft strains of music could be heard out of them. 

”I don’t think I’ll be going back.” Dean nodded and kissed his forehead. 

”Go set the table. This will be done in a minute.” 

~*~ 

Castiel had been afraid to go to sleep for over a year because he didn’t know what he would be facing. 

That night, however, he was ready. He laid next to his sleeping fiancé, trying to make sleep come so that he could prove it to himself. Finally he slipped into unconsciousness, in the early morning hours after he had pressed his face against Dean’s chest. 

Inais had a knife against his throat, he could feel the edge of the blade biting into his skin. 

”You’re not real,” His dream self said. “You’re dead.” 

The knife cut and Castiel woke up. 

He didn’t scream, he didn’t hit, Dean was still sleeping peacefully next to him. He smiled and laid his head back down. 

It was a step in the right direction and that was all he needed.


End file.
